Life in the Fast Lane Means No Clean Clothes

I know laundry is not a particularly interesting topic but it's an ever-increasing part of my life...literally....as my dirty clothes pile increases and I'm down to my last underwear and bra.

Yes, I have been busy and you'd think any rational (or clean) girl would have stuffed the washer by now, on this serene Monday night, but oh no- I've decided to update my blog instead! My mother would have a heart attack.

Last week, I shot a nice, fun role on the movie "Glory Days." Basically I played the bitchy, door woman, with the clipboard, that steers a bunch of girls away from the velvet rope, back in 1989. When I realized I had been cast in something taking place in the 80s, I acknowledged this was a dream-come-true. I mean I live my life in the 80s: Through the music in my car, through the songs played at my parties, my style, my Michael Jackson fandom, my early Madonna worship, my pilot presentation "Revivals," which by the way....

....is being screened on Tuesday April, 6th @ 8:30pm at Cinespace in Hollywood. Getting everything together for the big event, only a week away, is a good test in stress management. But I wanted it and now I got it and soon the audience decides whether it's worth it. I think it is, but I'm biased, obviously. I will reiterate the story of "Revivals" in 3 words...one-hit wonders...ghosts...awesomeness. Intrigued? Come check it out!

Oh and I'm also in full rehearsals for the play "Sacrifice," which opens mid-April at the Sunset-Gardner Stages. I am excited cause I get to use my REAL accent and can get back into a sexier role. Being engulfed in the land of comedy (through the jobs I booked AND my laughable REAL LIFE of the past couple of years) my goofiness has outshone my seductive wiles so in true Justin Timberlake fashion, I intend to "bring sexy back bitches"...okay, I added the "bitches" part, but you get my gist.

I wish I could spill some other gossip that I'm involved in but alas, I would seem even more narcissistic and actually (the real reason) is I have to keep it under wraps anyway....wahahahaha. So there ends my list of excuses for why my clothes aren't washed.

By the way, Happy Passover to all my Jewish pals! You'll be happy to know I drank some red wine on your behalf while writing this...wait? I do that anyway, don't I? Well, I guess I'm a just a constant-celebratory-honorary Jew then. Hire me.

Video Blog #8

The Three Bs

No, it's not Booze, Boys and Books. Though flashing back to college days it might have been. Hell, even my college started with a "B"- Brown University (pretentious-Ivy-League-name-drop alert!).

But the 3 Bs that I'll be discussing in this blog are Burlesque, Big News & Bret Michaels. Although these words could realistically-speaking be found within the same TMZ article (think about it "Bret Michaels' Hook Up With Burlesque Girl is Big News", right? right?) they were actually separate activities for the month of February.

With that disclaimer, I move on...

1st BURLESQUE: In an effort to get in touch with my feminine side, after growing the iron balls equivalent to a superhero's needed to survive this town, I enrolled in "It's A Chick Productions" dance classes: http://www.itsachick.com/ Black boa feathers and blue, silk gloves were included in the price and I am now working out muscles in my body that I never knew existed, though it seems a little sacrilegious for Sunday mornings. Yes, readers, I may be the girl with the least tattoos in class (i.e. none) but hey, it's time for me to expand my horizons, right? If I paste a a skulled Marilyn Monroe framed by a thorny heart on my shoulder, then you can worry.

Last Monday I got to witness the burlesque pros in all their sparkly and feathered glory, including Sarah Milligan aka Coquette, who introduced me to the class in the first place. Seriously, these ladies make most modern dance romps look tacky and extremely unsexy in comparison. Monday Night Tease at the 3 of Clubs on Vine was a hoot!

2nd BIG NEWS: a sketch show on the news. Might not sound original but I'm in it and so are a bunch of other quirky players, so it is original, goddammit (she says with raised fist!). News spoofs are so old skool now anyway that they're due to be new school again. We have a great group of writers and directors plucked out from IO West and our viral videos will be featured on the Huffington Post soon. Also (drumroll) we'll be doing a live show of the "Best of Big News Videos" at Fanatic Salon on the Westside, Friday, March 26th. And cause it's a stage show we'll of course squeeze in some live sketches and news casting. Rumor has it that I'm the wacky entertainment correspondent. Someone knows me too well. Burp.

And 3rd but not least Bret Michaels: Am I his new Rock of Love, no. Did I bang him, no. But thanks to my roommate I did get to go to the taping of his new VH1 show (yes, another one) Rock'n'Roll Fantasy Camp. Weeee! Groupies don't kill me that word didn't get out to you! At least you can relish the fact that he did NOT get a chance to sing "Every Rose Has It's Thorn" (an evil trick on the producers' side, I'm sure). But I won't hide that he is even hotter in real life than on-camera and that's coming from someone who is not into dudes with long hair. The fake tan was immaculate, there were no wrinkles on his face, which makes me suspicious Botox needles (not just drug ones) have entered this man's veins. The legends of rock came up on stage at the end to play with the winners and that's all I can say for now because my roommate just informed me I am sworn to secrecy....after all, the show has not aired. Ooops. So tune in!!!

Okay, done with the Bs. Now starts March Madness and all the excitement it entails. I've blabbered so much about other stuff that who the hell cares about the important stuff happening in my life right now. Certainly not me....but watch this space ;)